Wallaby Wednesday: What other episodes should a Rocko live read feature?

It is hard to imagine any Rocko’s Modern Life aficionado omitting a cast reunion/panel/live table read from their bucket list. If the concept did not occur to one on its own before, the reality surely whet one’s appetite in 2012.

That was when creator Joe Murray and several key crew members convened in Los Angeles with four key actors. Concomitant with the show’s long-awaited DVD release, Charlie Adler, Carlos Alazraqui, Tom Kenny and Doug Lawrence revived their flagship RML voices via “Wacky Delly: Part I.”

Three years later, when Adler, Alazraqui and Kenny hit Florida Supercon, they resourcefully read “Cabin Fever.” Mr. Lawrence was preoccupied with a cartoon production commitment, for which his colleagues pardoned him in the subsequent Q-and-A.

Naturally, the top unanswered question from that panel is why stop there? There are more episodes worth reenacting, and more recurring performers worth trying to get in on the act.

As it relates to Rocko, ’90s nostalgia is doing nothing if not intensifying. To keep scratching that itch, one can hope various combinations of the cast will work to regroup for more table reads before adoring audiences.

Given her higher-profile career in live-action directing and production, Linda Wallem may be harder to borrow for a reunion. Then again, per the Internet Movie Database, the Carol Cleveland to Rocko’s Monty Python did reprise Dr. Hutchison and Crazy Aunt Gretchen in the (finally) soon-to-premiere Static Cling.

In short, never say never on anyone’s availability as long as they have a pulse. But apart from the most crucial troika based on volume of appearances, be prepared to make do with who you can get.

On that note, this author has selected the best live-read material based on various potential absences or lack thereof. None of this is to rate a given episode in general over its peers. These choices are based largely on lines that would be the most fun to see spoken by the source’s mouth.

“Rocko’s Happy Vermin”

While his chief character, Heffer, sits this story out, Kenny would get plenty of work as Flecko. Still, in this hypothetical repeat of the 2015 Florida Supercon lineup, he would take a backseat to Adler and Alazraqui.

The reason: This segment’s climactic scene bears several gems of dialogue between Rocko and both Bigheads. Flecko silently sets it off by writing a blunt message while Rocko reads it in real time.

“He’s…going…to…eat us…you…idiot.”

After more of Flecko’s louder-speaking actions, Ed is in one of his amusingly disoriented states. That is where we get Rocko peering into a fallen piano and cautiously suggesting, “I think I’ll take the bugs home now. Okay?”

“Bugs?” Ed asks in a not-so-Ed-like voice. “What are bugs?”

“Goodnight, Mr. Bighead,” Rocko replies as he opportunistically closes the piano cover. Ed continues to ramble, “Bugs? I don’t know about bugs.”

Rocko then completes his rescue by pretending to sample his neighbors’ intended meal. As Bev keeps granting his request for “More please,” he sustains the pattern in an exponentially full-mouth voice.

Not to be forgotten in all of that: Alazraqui also voices the overly enthusiastic exterminator.

 

“Uniform Behavior”

Granted, Wallem would be underutilized in this scenario. Barring a special addition to the script or a trade in additional roles, her only line, as Virginia Wolfe, would be, “Now dear, let’s not lose our temper.”

That aside, watching Kenny whimper “I feel naked and alone” to start the final scene would all but singlehandedly justify the price of admission. The preceding “I don’t want to be a cop anymore!” and several guttural screams of fright would not hurt either.

Assuming Alazraqui is emceeing, like he did for the “Cabin Fever” live read, he would have an easy time colorfully setting every scene. Heffer’s stripping and streaking and the slew of Shining references that precipitate it would make the meat of that aspect.

“Belch of Destiny” would be another solid option for the five-some of Adler, Alazraqui, Kenny, Lawrence and Wallem. This Heffer-centric episode would also let Adler bring back George Wolfe. Wallem would speak briefly as Virginia, and also play the Weasel Scout troop guide.

Getting David Pritchard to recreate his famous belch-talking (his only IMDB acting credit) on cue would be a tall order. But surely a recording is available, which would have the added benefit of Kenny lip-syncing the lines as Heffer.

“I Have No Son!”

If it’s the four main male actors plus Murray, there is only one logical untapped choice. Since they have already redone “Wacky Delly” (or at least half of it), Ralph Bighead’s other speaking appearance is the way to go.

For Lawrence, whose performing parts paled in comparison to his three core castmates over the breadth of the series, this would be an exceptional opportunity to shine. He is the real-life creator of The Fatheads, and also narrates the show within the show.

Those interspersed “clips” would also give Alazraqui or Murray a chance for more colorful dialogue-framing descriptions. And while Martin Olson’s corporeal presence to provide the one-man laugh track would be best, a recording would suffice.

Not to mention, who among the Rocko fan base would not want to watch Murray recreate Ralph’s “Never!” tirade in its entirety?

“Tickled Pinky”

This would be the best option for a panel that Wallem makes but Lawrence misses. Between Hutch, Pinky, Ms. Pancreas and Rocko’s bladder, Wallem would get ample, wide-ranging work. Perhaps the best among that would be Rocko’s appendix adorably making dangerous requests.

Meanwhile, Alazraqui and Kenny would primarily stick to their core characters, and Adler would have fun reviving Seymour the boil-laden ram.

“To Heck and Back” is a close runner-up for this lineup. Wallem plays Karen and the cashier, and Kenny steals the spotlight through his double-shifting dialogue as Heffer and Peaches.

“Kiss Me, I’m Foreign”

This would all but signal the best-case gang’s-all-here scenario. There would be a sufficient supply of lines for Wallem as Hutch plus the voices of Rocko, Heffer, Filburt and the Bigheads. Alazraqui would have extra duties as the turn-the-page-wash-your-hands rabbit.

As a bonus, under these circumstances, Quinn Kitmitto would be there to bring back her first animation acting role. She memorably enlivened the perky judge who officiates Rocko’s “wedding” with “Ophelia.”

“Speaking Terms”

With Nosey slated to come back in Static Cling, Jill Talley will double the Rocko credits on her resume. But within the series, Kenny’s wife (they married the year this episode premiered) had one go-round as the talk-show host capitalizing on Heffer and Rocko’s feud.

In the episode, Filburt does his part to egg his bickering friends on. But with the embarrassingly motherly Virginia playing peacekeeper, Wallem has a notable role as well.